VLOG 23

Girlfriends’ Guide to Divorce is About to Return in a New Season. You:

Last Week’s Poll Results: This was such a close race, but Cookie, Empire’s star, came out on top. Doesn’t she always?

GIRLFRIENDS’ GUIDE TO SISTERHOOD

I have already proclaimed “Girlfriends’ Guide to Divorce” as my favorite new show, but it just keeps giving me more and more reasons to love it. Not only is the dialogue crisp and clever and the ideas original and refreshing. These last couple of episodes saw Abby McCarthy (my darling Lisa Edelstein, who shines in this role) actively and unapologetically advocating for divorce and taking on slut shaming for all its ugliness. We sure have come a long way. This is, at least to my knowledge, the first time a television show has dared to take mature women and liberate them, not only from the need for a perfect marriage, but the need for a marriage, period.

If you are not watching the show (and why aren’t you? Are you crazy??), it is Bravo’s first original scripted drama, and it revolves around a group of 30- and 40-something women, Abby at their center, mostly divorced with children, who are dealing with things the new age woman has to deal with: how to juggle career and children, how to deal with life after marriage, how to reinvent yourself in your profession, how to fight systemic sexism and ageism, and how to create meaningful relationships with the world around you despite your insecurities.

While “Sex and the City” and “Desperate Housewives” may have celebrated independent single (or divorced or widowed) women, it also had the women constantly on the look out for their next ideal match. In fact, their level of obsession with the need to find a man sometimes seemed near pathological.

“Girlfriends’ Guide to Divorce,” on the other hand, frees our women to live as full human beings, meaning they are not reliant on a romantic relationship to feel validated or complete. Abby is dating more for her own experience as a sexual, playful, passionate woman, rather than because she’s looking for her next husband. Phoebe (Beau Garrett) experiments with everything, from women to threesomes to, God knows what next. Delia (Necar Zadegan) puts her career ahead of everything, as she’s also trying to deal with her fear of commitment. And Lyla (Janeane Garofalo) is currently MIA because she’s running away from her ex who is trying to get custody of her children.

Most importantly, these women value one another as their main source of comfort, support and validity. When they look at one another, they see a full human being, who isn’t lacking a thing, especially not a penis. This is why Abby, being a good friend who actually sees her female friends, encourages her friend Jo (Alanna Ubach) to divorce her lousy husband (who later turns out to be a pathological liar). Being divorced no longer has to mean being alone and having to start roaming the earth in search of your next man. It can mean being liberated from a relationship that no longer benefits you, liberated to develop your full (and that also means, sexual) self with the support of your sisters who see and accept you for who you really are.

Way to go, GG2D. Please keep doing what you’re doing!

I only have a couple of suggestions that would make this show even better. For starters, it would help if every woman on the show wasn’t skinny and perfectly groomed at all times (and always in high heels!). I mean, yes, they are lovely to look at, and I’ve publicly thanked Bravo for explicitly asking Edelstein not to tamper with her face. But do all mature women out there have to feel that in order to perfectly relate to these characters they have to aspire to what is for most women an unrealistic look, or one that comes at the heavy price of eating disorders, constant dieting, plastic surgery or an exercise obsession? (That is, by the way, a rhetorical question).

Second, it would be great if the show could incorporate a little more diversity. As things stand now, Delia is the only ethnic female character. And I am grappling with the question of why would a show that focuses on women choose to represent sexual orientation diversity in the form of a relationship between two gay men. Why not have an interesting lesbian relationship on the show? Lesbianism has so far been depicted on the show as something fun to try out, something to tantalize the viewers with, but not as a real, substantial relationship.

According to the list of writers on the show, it appears there are five male writers and three female writers. Perhaps flipping that balance would help add more range of representation and make the women not only deal with real issues but also look more real to their target audience. It is not as hard to “prove” you can be a successful and desirable mature divorced mother when you make those women look like single college-age chicks who in their looks embody an almost opposite message of that which their characters are delivering.

No, having more real looking women would not send the message that after a certain age you don’t have to care about yourself or your appearance. Rather, it would say, “your value is in much more than your obsession with your appearance.”

Hollywood actresses, unfortunately, have to live by this rule. Their value, more often than not, comes down to their appearance, even before their talent. How innovative would it be to have shows, characters and actresses who can deliver this true message of liberation and validity wholly.

LADY TIDBITS:

Grey Matters:

 “Grey’s Anatomy” came back last Thursday after the holiday hiatus in an episode that highlighted the joyous, and sometimes not-so-joyous, complexities of 21^st century motherhood. Meredith was struggling to find a nanny who would be there to support her career ambitions instead of her husband who could not. God-fearing April was struggling to settle her religious beliefs with her anger and sadness over her unborn baby’s fatal disease. Bailey was struggling to quiet her guilt over not being there for her son’s important moments. And the ER was filled with people who were injured when a mother drove her car off a bridge with her two children in it.

Although the show raised some important issues that working mothers deal with all the time in this age when women are told they can “have it all,” the show ultimately ended on a typical “order is restored” note. The mother who caused the accident was not a “crazy mother;” mothers, according to the show, would never do anything to intentionally harm their kids, or at least, that’s what the mothers among our characters would like to think. No, the poor woman turned out to have a tumor that caused her to “not be herself.”

Yes, mothers are heroic and they balance so much for what is oftentimes a pretty thankless job. But the world would not have collapsed if it turned out that some mothers sometimes can’t take the burden and break and do awful things to themselves and their loved ones. In fact, it may have been an interesting opportunity to explore the mental impact that trying to “have it all” might have on some women with a weaker mental constitution or those who have caved to society’s expectations (that all women’s greatest desire is to be mothers), denying their real needs and wants. But that opportunity was cast aside in favor of one that makes people feel safer, not to say warm and fuzzy.

You’re Already So Short:

 A recent episode of the wonderful series “The Fosters” saw Mariana (Cierra Ramirez), who has finally found out she has a talent (thank goodness. I was worried!) for sciences, make herself smaller in order to not threaten her boyfriend. This happened after her science buddy, and the only other female in the class, Emma (Amanda Leighton) warned her that her male-counterpart, twin brother Jesus, left her because she was obviously smarter than him.

I was so pleased to see this important storyline. So many young girls feel they have to minimize their abilities and success, or at least feel insecure about them and underplay them, in order to not threaten men or boys around them. Girls learn at a very young age to be demure, while boys are encouraged to be ambitious and competitive. This is something that I would like to see more actively addressed both on television and in real life. Enough with cutting women down to size!

GOLDEN GIRLS – PART II

*** EXCITING NEWS COMING UP FROM LADY PARTS. LOOK OUT FOR AN ANNOUNCEMENT ON NEW YEAR’S DAY***

Last week we discussed the Golden Globes’ drama categories and the all-in-one supporting actress category. This week, let’s look at the other two major categories: comedy/musical and miniseries/TV movie.

These two fields show most obviously how tricky categorizing television has become. Never mind that Netflix and Amazon have been competing in these television categories even though they are not, technically, television. Is “Orange is the New Black” really a comedy? Is “American Horror Story” a miniseries all the way into its fourth season?

I’ll admit, I am not a big comedy viewer. It’s not because I don’t like comedy, but because as they say, “dying is easy; making a good scripted comedy show that doesn’t stoop to poop and fart jokes is hard.” Truly smart and original comedies like “Modern Family” are a rarity on television (which is why, even though it’s in its sixth season, “Family” should have still been nominated, both for best series and for best supporting actors).

Nevertheless, in the Best Series, Comedy or Musical, the nominees are: “Girls,” “Jane the Virgin,” “Orange is the New Black,” Silicon Valley,” and “Transparent.”

My prediction and choice: Even though I could easily give “Orange” the award that it was not nominated for last year, timing is everything, as we know, and this year is the year of “Transparent.” This is one of the best and most original shows we’ve seen in a long time. Its tenderness and insight into the human condition, combined with the appeal of the family bonds we all yearn for (no matter how messy that family is) is just irresistible.

I do not watch any of the other three shows, but for good reasons. “Silicon Valley” needs to take some massive dosages of estrogen supplements to treat its severe female deficiency before I even bother to check it out. “Girls,” albeit a show about, well, girls, depicts the lives of four of the least relatable female characters on television. And I tried watching “Jane the Virgin” but turned off the TV set halfway into the “previously on…” catch up. I used to love telenovelas, but I just couldn’t get into this offbeat parody.

But no matter who wins, one thing about this category seems certain: Girls rule comedy!

Four out of the five nominees are female-driven shows. “Girls,” “Orange” and “Transparent” are ensemble shows, with practically all-women casts, and “Jane the Virgin” is a female-centric show. All four of these shows were created and are run by women. “Silicon Valley” is the single testosterone-packed show, both in front of and behind the camera, but it appears to be the least likely winner.

When we get to the Best Actress in a Comedy or Musical Series, the choice isn’t as simple. The nominees are: Lena Dunham (“Girls”), Edie Falco (“Nurse Jackie”), Gina Rodriguez (“Jane the Virgin”), Julia Louis-Dreyfus (“Veep”), and Taylor Schilling (“Orange is the New Black”).

My prediction: This category is not easy to predict. It could go to Julia Louis-Dreyfus, who is one of the best female comedians we have. If we go with the complete wild card, which the Globes sometimes likes to pull, then it could be Gina Rodriguez. Or maybe the Hollywood Foreign Press will decide to give the award to Lena Dunham, who is retiring from acting on the show. It’s a real toss up. If I had to bet, I would say Taylor Schilling has the best chance because she would now be winning for two seasons, since she didn’t win last year.

My choice: Both Edie Falco and Julia Louis-Dreyfus haven’t won for their current shows yet. Both shows are excellent, and both actresses are superb. I would be happy if either of them finally took the award for all those years of outstanding work, doing comedy, drama, satire and social criticism on two very good shows.

But I would have really liked to see Lisa Kudrow and “The Comeback” in these two categories. I would have still liked “Transparent” to win, but “The Comeback” could have easily replaced one of the other nominees; and Lisa Kudrow could have won the best actress category easily. Not only is she the brains behind the show, not only has she staged one of the best comebacks on television, but also, her Valerie Cherish is one of the most nuanced and intelligent characters in comedy. Kudrow manages to be heartbreaking, cringe-worthy and hilarious at the same time, and that is a difficult combination to pull off!

Moving on to the Best Miniseries/TV Movie category, we are in for some hard choices. The nominees are: “Fargo,” “The Missing,” “True Detective,” “The Normal Heart,” and “Olive Kitteridge.”

My prediction: Ugh, this is where I ask, why did I get myself into the business of prophesying? “True Detective” has been in the forefront to win the entire year, but then, some stiff competition arose just in the nick of time to be nominated and better remembered. “The Missing” is a nail-biting, heart-crushing show that is absolutely worthy of the award. “The Normal Heart” is an outstanding achievement, worthy of the twenty years it’s taken to put Larry Kramer’s very important and powerful play on film. “Olive Kitteridge” is an exceptional depiction of the oft-mishandled subject matter of living with mental illness and it features some of the best acting on television this year (and is actually a true miniseries, limited to one season). And “Fargo,” though I personally have not watched it, is touted as an excellent show.

My bet will have to be on “Olive Kitteridge,” for no other reason than a hunch, since truly it could be any of these nominees.

My choice: Again, this is almost an impossible choice. But as much as I loved “Olive Kitteridge” and “The Normal Heart” and would be thrilled to see them win, I would have to choose “The Missing.” Even though I think the show is a little too long, the only reason I feel that way is because I watch it in unbearable agony. The fact that the show is so charged with anxiety and so forceful in its quiet desperation, yet isn’t antagonizing in its agonizing, is a masterful achievement. And despite reviews dissing the “loss of a child” subject matter as an easy emotional manipulator, this show is not just about the kidnapping. It is about corruption and relationships and the human psyche and how it bends and twists to avoid breaking altogether. Simply sublime.

Finally, we’ve arrived at one of the most competitive categories this year: Best actress in a miniseries/TV movie. The nominees are: Maggie Gyllenhaal (“The Honourable Woman”), Jessica Lange (“American Horror Story: Freak Show”), Frances McDormand (“Olive Kitteridge”), Frances O’Connor (“The Missing”), and Allison Tolman (“Fargo”).

My prediction: I feel strongly that Frances McDormand will win. Her performance as the depressed but fascinating Olive was spectacular, and a win for her would go great with a win for the series.

My choice: I would love to give a four-way tie to Gyllenhaal, Lange, McDormand and O’Connor (since I don’t watch “Fargo,” I am not familiar with Tolman’s performance). O’Connor is heartbreaking in “The Missing,” and, even though I haven’t watched “Freak Show,” Jessica Lange has been mind-blowingly good on all the previous seasons, so why should anything be different now?

But my number one this year has to be Maggie Gyllenhaal. I never even particularly liked her and had considered her a light-weight actress until I saw her in “The Honourable Woman.” In this superlative show, she is completely transformed into the sophisticated, layered, intriguing Nessa Stein. It is a crime is that the show was not nominated for best miniseries. Not only should it have been nominated, it should have won.

So now, all that is left is to wait for January 11^th, when I personally will be glued to the screen for one of my favorite nights of the year. And you will be sure to hear from me after!

LADY TIDBITS:

BRAVO OF THE WEEK:

Bravo to “Bravo” on a great first foray into the land of originally scripted shows. “Girlfriends’ Guide to Divorce” is a fun, spunky, well-written show with a strong friendship between three women at its core and, most importantly, Lisa Edelstein as its lead actress.

The show offers a new look at relationships, marriage and divorce, daring to look at things that television more often prefers to steer clear of. The women struggle with the postmodern trap of striving to proudly be an empowered and independent woman and look for a truly equal partnership while performing as mothers and businesswomen, and being constantly judged for the way they juggle all these roles. To top it off, the show is a champion for equality, featuring a gay male marriage storyline that is getting equal treatment with the rest of the struggling marriages on the show.

We have only seen four episodes so far, but I can already determine that the show is headed in directions that I like. Two thumbs up!

BE RIGHT BACK:

“Lady Parts” is going on a short hiatus and will return mid-January in a new format. Make sure to check out the special announcement on NEW YEAR’S DAY to find out what’s in store for 2015!

“LADY PARTS” WISHES YOU A WONDERFUL HOLIDAY SEASON AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR!